It all started today at lunch time. We (the fourth years) were arriving back at school to find a bunch of munchkin juniors playing on bikes etc. When one of them fell of we could not help but take the crap out the wee guy who was by this time calling his friend over. In the thought that they were gonna come over to us and say something we came up with a plan to come full out and ask them for square goes.... to our astonishment we didn't have to for before long they were calling square goes with one of the guys Ally.
Amazed at such comedy we all crowded round in a group and started to try and piss them off.... the had the crap taken outa them left right and centre.... but the story gets better. Eventually they leave... we have jokes about them going round and getting a bunch of sixth years to kick s in but we have a laugh anyway. When they come back the have almost 20-25 people watching!!!! We were laughing our heads off at these little idiots trying to scare us.... Ally was lapping it up and whenever he stood forward they would all run away again. (Kids huh) Eventually Koochy saw things start to go a little too far, so with me and the guys on standby at the side he got them over and tried to straighten things out with them, not very successfully. However at that point the bell ran and the orders were given to follow the running mob back into school where we soon headed for our classes. But I have a feeling it wont stop there.... see you tomorrow folks.... if I survive the attack of the munchkin people!!!!!!!!!!!!



The Gossip Never stops
Yes that's right people I am bringing you yet more of that stuff all women seems to thrive off of and all men seem to be a part of... Gossip. The latest news around school is the "New Girl" who I won't name for my own safety due to the fact that the last time I put down a girls name without asking she tried to kill me.... (God never made periods to be bad to women... he did it to laugh at us men suffering). So as seen as I have still not asked (and have no intention of asking) her for the right to put her name up I will just asume you all know who she is. The next person who is involved in this little sherad is John Drummond.... yes thats right I said his name... why... why the hell not, I ain't scared of him.... wimper.
This is very simple.... during a conversation we were having to day I just happened to bring up her name. Now at first when asking him what he thought of her (Sorry) I was surprised to hear him call this stunning young woman a "Tart". When I asked him why he thought this he seemed to shy away.... Now being able to read people is an ability I use to the full.... and on this occasion it came in very handy! Judging by his reaction (I wont go into the exact details) I came to the conclusion his name calling for his defense.... defense against me finding out he felt completely the oposite!!! heheheheheheheheheehe When confronted by this he hid further and further away claiming he did not "Fancy" (for the record I HATE that word) her.... unfortunately for him I did not give up untill he admitted and once again admitted this time of free choice.... so now you may go forth and once again tak ehte crap outa John.... Hold on a minute..... why would we take the crap outa John.... everyone "Fancies" her (except Sad Loner who fancies Miss. Rosie)..... damn... that means this whole column was a waste of time..............................................................................................


Attack at Sad Loner!!!
it seems the infamous Sad Loner decided to attack me and scrub the column I wrote telling everyone how he thought his P7 teacher (Miss. Rosie) was in his words "hot". Therfore I will not write again I will leave him alone....
hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

Criminals Only.... that includes Koochy and Slash

Yes this is the well thought about and highly researched column containing information on how to beat the lie detector test! (none of this information is proven to be factual...... I have to say that!)

These are tips all you self known criminals must follow not to be caught out by mans new friend... machine (well its the friend of all you Sad Loner wannabes)

read and use as you wish...

1) Never look down when answering questions. It shows a sign of self disbeleif... the kinda thing a kid would do when caught stealing a biscuit before tea time.

2) If you have the chance rub talk powder into the areas where they are most likely to put sensor pads (chest arms and back of hands) This makes them appear a lot dryer and helps hold in the moisture. NEVER put it on the palm of you hands as it will obsorb the sweat and make you appear to sweat constantly.

3) Always answer a question with a signal. Example when answering yes nod your head at the same time. This shows a sign of self beleif. Never however shake your head as if you are being attacked by a swarm of man eating 50 foot wasps. This shows that you are trying to make yourself look inocent and makes you make more guilty.

4) Focus your sight on one thing in the room and keep looking there! If you get nervous you start to fijit and Look around quickly as if looking for ideas on how to answer.

5) DON'T FIJIT!

6) Concentrate on blinking at a steady pace. The more nervous you become the more you blink.... This is something they will pick up on.

And Finally

7) Never act surprised to hear any question or laugh if given a possible reason for your behavior during the event in question which they ask you to verify but which you wont verify because it would get you in trouble. Doing so shows you are getting nervous at the thought they may be getting closer to the truth or closer to asking the right questions. hey will pick up on this and keep asking these questions..... FAST. ONE AFTER ANOTHER AFTER ANOTHER AFTER ANOTHER AFTER ANOTHER. Don't fall into the trap....
Good luck my little terrors!